BREATHE IN , BREATHE OUT.............THAT WILL BE RS5000 PLEASE

I wasn’t going to write about this but recently I was subjected to some spiritual-yoga classes compulsorily which pissed me off big time and hence this post. Don’t worry I don’t have any grudges about yoga or your ancient breathing techniques, really, if you think it works for you then there is absolutely no reason why you shouldn’t spend a fortune learning basic breathing techniques or learning how to be a better human being from a long haired, bearded man. My problem is with the way they portray it among the masses and the way the masses portray them.

All of this just looks like a big marketing ploy to me. Even the famous ‘art of living’ foundation is more like an ‘art of marketing’ foundation. I mean all they do is repackage the same breathing exercises given by just about any other person and make it look attractive by having a suitable leader to profess it. Invariably most of such leaders you see have long hair,beard,wear white or saffron and always have that peace and tranquility look on their faces which is basically to show that they are above it all and that they know some revolutionary truth about life that you don’t. I just don’t understand why do they have to add a “sri” before their name and then to top it off they add one more and make it “sri sri”. I mean really, are these leaders having some ego battle with other leaders to show their greatness. Who gives them these titles anyways?? Stupid.

Then come the claims of his greatness because of his acts and lectures throughout the world advertised either in his congregation or on his website. Here is a sample headlines from the ‘art of living’ foundation website.

What pissed me off more is the thing which is written on their front page and highlighted in bold so as to attract the customers.

You know what guys,just because an organization is non profit doesn’t mean that it’s something really benevolent. One simple example- terrorists. They pretty much try to do the same thing,that is to profess their beliefs without making money. You think people who make profit don't do you good or don't have good intentions??So trying to rationalize the intention of an organization on this basis is inherently stupid. The person in context may be doing it for self satisfaction-that’s his profit and it is only that it happens to be accepted or termed as “good for society” which lets him off the hook. Its only a response to demand and supply and nothing more. Talking about demand and supply they do transfer essentials from other countries to poor regions of different countries like Africa but then for how long??

They teach those people there yoga. I am just thinking that when a child cannot get one small cup of rice the whole day then I don’t think yoga or any spiritual healing can fulfill that. They don’t need righteous speeches but something solid to build their economy because things cannot run on charity for too long,but hardly any major steps regarding this has been taken up by these organizations. This doesn’t mean that whatever they are doing is not helping ,it might be, but all I want to say is that if people think that taking up courses on such breathing exercises is making them a better human being or really happy and free or spiritually enhanced as they claim then you are just kidding yourself. Meditation or breathing might improve your concentration but it sure as hell won’t change the person you are . If you are an asshole now ,neither 10 minutes nor 10 months of “square breathing” is going to change that, you would still be an asshole. Just because you gave money to enroll doesn’t mean you are going to go through some transformation or going to learn some supreme way or art of living.

I dunno why they focus on not getting angry, I say anger is required,that’s one of the basic emotions since birth. When a child is happy it smiles and when it is unsatisfied and angry it cries,why do we need to change our basic emotions. Being angry is absolutely necessary , seriously people,one day just lash out at every fucking person you are angry at and I bet you, you will atleast feel ultimate satisfaction which even 10 months of “square breathing” can’t give or at the most may be getting fired. So joining art of living or getting fired ,either way you loose money,so why not the latter.

Ok then ,just let me sum it up for you . All these organizations or “sri sri ravi shankar” or any other such person is nothing more than a salesman to me who comes knocking on my door in the middle of the afternoon trying to advertise his stuff, I either look at it or just close the door if I don’t like the service being offered. Assuming to be offered anything more than that is simply a mistake and an overstatement.